Attorney General Eric Holder is being petitioned by law enforcement across the country to drop the charges against Cheysuli.
The case has come to Holder’s attention due to the large numbers of cats that have been incarcerated. While Federal Agents have extensive guidelines and photos, many agents are just picking up cats–any cats.
“You have no idea how many black and white cats, gray cats and even calico cats that they are picking up. Some agents are very thorough, even going so far as to check for pink toe pads, which Cheysuli as a chocolate point Siamese has. However many agents are just picking up anything with four legs. We’ve got a pack of German Shepherds and a bunch of chihuahuas. We even have a pot bellied pig being held. Many locations are starting to try and weed out the candidates who are obviously not Cheysuli but it’s getting difficult. Jail space is at a premium right now.”
Ironically, in spite of all the searching no one has “the real Cheysuli” at this point.
“We really think that there was no intention to purposefully impersonate a blimp. She had no name on her belly. We can’t just go arresting cats for looking fat for no reason. The credit card stealing doesn’t hold water either. These charges were obviously trumped up to get the government involved. There isn’t even any evidence linking Cheysuli to the whapped reporter a few years ago, except that the last story written was about her. Still, there is no evidence to tie her to the whapping. While she does have ties to Tony Soprano, she isn’t necessarily tied to any of his illegal activities. You can’t arrest someone for knowing someone and it does appear that Tony has sought out Cheysuli on numerous occasions, not the other way around.”
The only charge that seems to stick is using her own home grown catnip. “It’s not illegal to grow your own in the state of Washington,” said one spokesperson. “It shouldn’t be illegal to do something with it either.”
Whoa, it’s all making sense now…when Grete was running with her dog friends at the park, they were all stopped for questioning. She didn’t say anything about our home grown nip…she pretended not to care instead showing more interest in her friends ball…but she was a bit annoyed by it all. She did say she knows of 2 blimp-like cats, but their names start with N and G…and not C.
I always enjoy reading about this series, Chey~
LC, Ayla, and Iza says
We say that the general quadraped discriminitory arrests should stop imediately!
Just cause someone “meows” shouldnt make them subject ta arrestin… Or Beins gonna start finding poops in their shoos, ya know?
Milo and Alfie says
Chey is innocent. End of!
Chey, I know you are innocent of all charges.
The Creek Cats says
Chey, you are totally innocent, my friend!
Wonder if growing your own nip is illegal in NC?!
The Island Cats says
Chey…finally someone who makes sense…the charges should be dropped against you!
Gandalf and Grayson says
Gray cats, too?! :gasp:
A few Good Cats says
Chey, you’ve got friends in high places. They’ll help you beat this thing!
CCL Wendy says
Cheysuli should definitely be absolved of all charges. It seems like they are going to an awful lot of trouble, and causing trouble for countless others, for no reason, really. Sounds like a vendetta to me!
Agree with those above that all charges should be dropped.
Daisy the Curly Cat says
Um, can you get someone to arrest Harley? Please?
Jasper McKitten-Cat says
I hope this all gets cleared up. Especially the nip charges!
Considering how many cats seem to be being charged with impersonating blimps in this issue, it would seem that law enforcement’s blimp-testing procedures are flawed. What about very fluffy cats (like me) who only SEEM blimp-like? Underneath the fur I am very thin.
Sorry, I forgot to fill in my website url.
Yeah, it does sound like a vendetta (with a capital V!) … hmmmmm … time to get our your mask, Chey!
4 Boys and a Lady says
Chey, we’re sure you’re going to beat this. We haven’t had anyone pounding on our door to round us up… yet. *paws crossed*
Nermal, Nico, Virgil, Westley, and Mags
P.S. Our mom appreciates all your words of support at this time. Thank you!
Samuel Alfonse Meezer says
that’s right – it’s not illegal to know illegal people. or wait, people who do illegal things. allegedly illegal things. I don’t know anyone like that.
Hey Tony, wait up, wanna go out for cannoli?
Katz (And Other) Tales says
Time for all furries and fuzzies to rise up against this injustice? You may be Prez yet, Chey. Hooray for revolution!
Eric and Flynn says
Chey is innocent and we want to grow our own nip!
Keiko & Luna T. Katt says
You will puurrrsevere =^_^=
Gee, is someone finally showing some sense in DC?
Mum and Grampie had fishies for his purrthday dinner, no hams, no leftovers either!
We could be in big trouble if they are arresting fat cats! We hope the AG does the right thing.
Picking up anything with 4 legs?????????????????
Good thing they will drop this whole thing.
They are really making themselves look stupid!!
We know they ARE stupid, but when they look stupid…
Purrs Mickey,Georgia & Tillie
Sweet Praline says
I think you’ve been set up.